In part I of this article series, we explored anal sex basics: why you should consider trying it, common fears and misconceptions, how to ease into it, and how to practice it safely and hygienicly. (Take a couple minutes and review it here now if you need a refresher.
In this article, we’ll go deeper with self-exploration, non-penetrative anal options, as well as why it’s OK to be not just a receiver but a giver. In each section, we’ll also list the related session in the All About Anal series of the Emjoy app that contains even more information on the topic for you to explore.
So strap on your strap-on, grab that lube, and let’s dive right in!
Perfect your anal solo sesh
Self-exploration is key when trying something new. It helps you satisfy your curiosities by discovering what you like and tune into your body’s pleasure. Most importantly, it helps you become comfortable with something that you might be unsure about at first.
In fact, we recommend you try it a few times on your own so that you can be as comfortable as possible — mentally, emotionally, and physically — before moving on to exploring with a partner.
Here are a few tips to ensure ultimate relaxation during your solo sesh:
- Go somewhere where you feel comfortable and won’t be interrupted.
- Begin by thinking about or doing something that turns you on in order to get in the mood.
- Starting with your finger and lube of choice, gently circle the area around the anus.
- If you’d like, enter slowly, focusing on relaxing and contracting.
In the app: To continue the self-exploration process, check out the Anal Self-Touch session.
Non-penetrative anal play
When someone says the phrase “anal sex,” our brains typically go right to penetration. But just like other types of sex, penetration is just one option of many to explore when it comes to butt play.
First, try a slow, sensual massage using lotion or lube — an act that can be very erotic and arousing. Stroke gently by applying pressure to your muscles in the area around the anus to stimulate the many nerve endings. You can try it on your own, but it’s more arousing with a partner because you won’t know what to expect. You can use fingers, a vibrator, or your partner’s mouth. For extra pleasure, add additional pressure to other areas like the clit or breasts.
In the app: For more ways to have anal sex without penetration, check out the Non-Penetrative Anal session.
Try giving and receiving anal
It’s the 21st century and people are more open about their sexuality and preferences than ever. So shouldn’t this include the preference to give or receive anal sex, regardless of gender or sexual orientation? Time to dispel the repressive and outdated stereotypes that say only men can give anal sex and only women or gay men can receive it. Ultimately, sex is about pleasure, however we desire it.
With that said, here are some tips for how best to go about being both the giver and the receiver.
Tips for receiving anal
Clear communication is key when it comes to anal sex, especially when first venturing into this unknown journey that has the potential for pain. (Remember: anal sex should never hurt when done right!) The best way to increase the opportunity for pleasure and remove the possibility of pain is to plan ahead of time: clearly state your boundaries and understand what the other person is comfortable with and what they desire. And remember to check in with each other throughout the process.
To increase arousal, consider stimulating other areas such as the clitoris or vagina.
Tips for giving anal
There’s something empowering about women being able to take control and provide pleasure to our partners, and giving anal sex can be a great way to do just that.
In fact, those of us with male partners will be thrilled to hear that men have more erogenous zones than we initially thought. Similar to the G-spot, men have a p-point (prostate) that can help them achieve intense orgasms.
Just like being the recipient of anal sex, being the giver requires the same clear communication and consent throughout the process, if not more so: make sure you’re both in agreement on what you want and where to draw boundaries. Also, go extra slow and check in each step of the way.
As for how to give anal, you many options: fingers, dildos, strap-ons, and more.
In the app: For more on receiving, giving, and p-point pleasure, check out the aptly named Receiving Anal and Giving Anal sessions. And for the ultimate anal arousal, see our session on Anal Orgasms.
On our YouTube channel: How to Have Anal Sex: Anal Sex Tips for Beginners.
We hope these articles have helped answer your burning questions and satisfy your anal curiosities. Now relax, enjoy, and go celebrate all things booty!